Sunday, June 19, 2011

Not Goodbye, Just See you Later.

here i am sitting in a hotel in utah 2 days after graduation on my way to COLLEGE. holy. moley. this is crazy. one thing at a time though.
first things first:

what a stressful day. i had a dentist appointment at 9:20. i didn't get called back until 10 then the dentist didn't come until 10:40. and i had to leave for graduation at 11:30. I got home at 11:15 and hurried so fast i ran into my garage door. yes. you read that right. i was so anxious and stressed out i forgot to open the garage door before pulling out. i felt so stupid. luckily maggie (my honda civic) is ok and the garage door still worked. i pulled out in shame and as soon as i left the driveway i began to cry. that was only the beginning of my emotional day. but after a couple minutes of crying, i composed myself and picked up my other officers, and we headed on our way to the patriot center for graduation. we got there with no problem which helped calm me down. 

after a long wait to begin, everything was in place. all the graduates were lined up and ready to head out the tunnel to process out. i, being the class president, had to cut everyone and be out in front. as i walked by my fellow classmates, many cheered me on. it felt like such a long walk but it was much enjoyed on my part. i felt like i was running out the tunnel for the super bowl or some big game. i had mr. frohm, walking close behind me coaching me in one ear and my classmates cheering me in the other as i walked by. 

"make eye contact! speak really really slow!" yelled mr. frohm. "go annie!" "you can do this!" "we love you!" cheered my classmates. finally we reached the end of the tunnel. mr. frohm stopped, called my name solemnly and said, "good luck. you'll be great." and still my wonderful classmates were cheering me on. i took a deep breath and off we went. 

the next thing i know, im sitting on the stand anxiously waiting my time to speak. 
finally its my turn. i head up there, and surprisingly enough, i'm fine. a few nerves but i felt comfortable. like i was talking to a close friend. and i guess i was. i had become so close with many of my classmates and their parents that i was talking to close friends. it was fun. it was exhilarating. and when i came to my closing words, i wish i had written more. i wanted that moment to last as long as i could. i loved it. 

i sat back down, and took a huge breath. phew. i was done. 

then came all night grad. 
so much fun. lots of awesome prizes (i won a chick-fil-a giftcard whoop whoop) and lots of giggles and hearty laughs. 
but then the end came. 
i had been dreading that ever since i found out i'd be leaving the day after graduation. 
i started saying my goodbyes, and was doing alright, but then it really hit me. 
things are never going to be the same again. 
im not ever going to enter the walls of herndon high school the same way.
 i was holding back big alligator tears. 
one hard goodbye after another. 
too many great friends that i will miss. 

then i had to say goodbye to chloe. the girl who pushes me to do better. to be better. im so glad no one else was around to see how pathetic we were. literally sobbing. we held each other so tight hoping that that would make it so i didnt have to go. finally we had to let go. i had to just walk away. through our sobs we said a hopeful and determined "see you later." 

another hard goodbye. i went to breakfast with brandon, my logical, usually-right, and patient best friend. we had a wonderful breakfast and then came back to my house to see the rents. chatted some more. then it was time to go. we had a good hug and went our separate ways. of course i was holding back tears. i was determined not to let myself sob in front of anyone again. 
another hopeful and determined "see you later."

then maybe the hardest goodbye of all. 
i went to her grad party then when it was time to leave, i had to give a quick hug then book it out the door so i wouldnt start sobbing in front of everyone. 
shaunessy is my go to girl. 
if i need some one to go with me to something, she is the first girl i ask. 
we have been friends ever since i can remember and the thought of things changing so much that i wont see her everyday, scares me. 
but it was again another hopeful, and slightly more determined, "see you later."

And as i sat ont he plane about to take off to leave beautiful virginia, i was holding back tears as i thought of all the wonderful things about virginia.
Herndon High School
all my great friends, 
my family, 
the green trees that are amiss here in Utah, 
and much more. 
But like everyone else i had to remind myself. 
this isn't goodbye.
it's a hopeful and very determined, "see you later."

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