Wednesday, July 20, 2011

Any Ugly Criers Out There? (...shamefully raising my hand...)

Today. Today was a good day. Like a really good day. I cried. And usually for me that means it was a release of stress, worry, or anxiety. I don't cry often from sadness or being upset like normal people.

I talked about in my last blog how I was struggling with test scores and being successful in my classes even with my Learning Disability and today I actually did something about it. I went to talk to my Book of Mormon teacher (who is simply the greatest by the way. I adore him.) anyways...I knew that he would be completely understanding and helpful it was just getting up the courage to talk to him I guess? I don't really know. Well I finally just did it. I went up and talked to him. I told him how I was disappointed with my last test grade and how it doesn't show how much I have learned and how much I studied and then he asked if I had had an issue with test taking before. That's when I took a breath and did my best to explain my Executive Functioning Disorder. Just as I had anticipated he was so understanding and helpful. He told me to go to the Disability Office on campus and tell them about everything and they can give me a paper that I can give to my teachers so they can work with me on it. He said he could give me a take home test, the same as everyone else's but just for me to take home to be able to take my time on and do bits and pieces at a time. How perfect. I was just holding back tears.
Then he said the part that made me burst into tears. (So embarrassing..) But he could obviously tell I was holding back tears because when I cry I get really red and just get a really really ugly face. (hence the embarrassing-ness of it..see picture>>>)
ANYWAYS. He told me not to be embarrassed, or feel sorry about it because it's just who I am and how I learn and there is nothing to apologize for. Then through my tears I said sorry. haha After he had just told me not to but I was apologizing for crying and being a mess.  It was just everything I had been needing to hear and I just was so relieved to have that of my chest and just know what to do to resolve it. *sigh* What a good day.

Oh! And as a bonus I had lunch with my sister today. I told my mom I was glad we were friends now. We hadn't always been. But now we are and I am loving it. Every time I see her I feel we get so much more close and just better friends. She gives the best advice and is just the best big sister ever. Love her.

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